Imagine two people making love on top of a unicorn . . . my life is the opposite of that.
I don't know how many crown and cokes he went through but I know it was more that I have fingers. We are never leaving Texas.
I NEED TO NOT REMEMBER THIS IN THE MORNING. He is our TEACHER.
I'm a 23 year old virgin. I've masturbated in ways you can't even imagine.
Remember that crazy chick I've been ignoring and said I wouldn't bang her again? Can we start that again part today?
just saw a guy snowshoeing to the liqour store
was it you?
...yes
so i might have figured out why that girl isn't talking to me...I'm 90% confident I didn't give her a pillow when she stayed over >.>
Just came to the realization that what I thought were orgasms were just lightheadedness from hyperventilation. My entire sex life is a lie.
put something nutritious in your body. AND NOT JUST THAT JOINT.
This day took a left turn at "This is your going away party, I got a bunch of blow."
It's true. There would need to be A LOT of data collection. Aka, dick-catching. I volunteer as tribute.
I made a separate snapchat account so I could swap nudes with a guy from omegle.
Why do all of your bad decisions sound like fucked up mad libs?
He poured champagne on my pussy while he ate me out. I found my unicorn.
She never came back from the bathroom so I went to look for her... I was in my room and heard this rustling. And she was in my closet petting ties.
She should be a lawyer. She convinced her husband to give her a hall pass AFTER he walked in on her in bed with her ex-bf
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