Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
Moved my bed either I'm a whore or every guy I have ever slept with hid condom wrappers under my bed
Making jello shots drunk, i apologize ahead of time if they are too strong Can't taste anything.
We officially wrote our house rules 1. We do not waste alcohol 2. Pinky promises mean something 3. Don't leave your facebook open, and if you do, don't complain 4. Never refuse cuddle or catch phrase
He is currently pregaming mini golf. MINI GOLF.
You puked on the bar then proceeded to walk out. I told the bartender some girl walked up, puked and left and he gave me a free drink. Hope you got home safe.
Better safe and shitfaced than hungover and in need of another surgery.
BTW, Julia referred to you as a power bottom. Are you available?
Fyi - we're going to be eating those sandwiches in bed when you get home.
you know what? fuck you, fuck your nana, and ESPECIALLY FUCK THE BLACKHAWKS.
I was at a hookups house and peed in his sink so I wouldn't wake up his mom... drunk me is on a different level
Chili is not acceptable fuck buddy food.
Just to clear things up, yes you did lick the strippers butt
Became friends with a girl at work today until I realized we have the same taste in men. And I thought only I liked red-bearded fat men
i told her we had a class about unicorns together. i'd say it was a good night
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