remember the good old days of high school when a half gal would last for more than a nite
Dude, I just saw a sixteen year old girl in a catholic school uniform buying a pregnancy test... With a coupon!
It's Monday. What a great day to start the weekend on the week of st. Patricks day
I just made my bed perfectly before realizing that I'll be too drunk to appreciate it tonight
so,apparently a side effect from having sex on the beach is now i have a tanline shaped like your sister
i hate you
No, you don't understand. If the words "stop," "alcohol poisoning," and "regret" aren't in the same sentence by the end of the night, I will have failed this birthday.
All you need to do now is invest in a Speedo and start going door to door.
her dad gauges his nipple piercings.
Yea he called the cop officer fonzarelli and asked him if he was mad because happy days was off the air. Boom, beaten and arrested
Because of my cut offs, my brother is convinced I fucked a girl so hard she forgot to take her pants. Fairly accurate.
The one time my sister did shrooms she thought she was thumbalina. I can't live my life that way
So to add to headbutting the microwave while waiting for my hot pockets to cook. I apparently told both bartenders earlier in the night I was going to fuck them both. I hate black out drunk me..
is it acceptable to cross the border for sex?
the night was just a blur of sex and pie
I woke up in your kitchen with my ID in my hand and my nails were painted electric blue. Dude.... never let me have fireball again.
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