If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
I'm getting very good at recycling my hook ups. So even though i'm having more sex... I'm the same amount of slutty.
Yes! I like to call that picking from the buffet!
He cant even get with danielle. Thats like striking out in t-ball
I've thrown up so many times in the third floor bathroom of Baldwin that they should probably just go ahead and name it after me.
id like to know how you successfully locked me in your backseat last night
my roommate is sobbing and looking at photos of elephants. i'm so confused.
Found my bike today. On top of the garage. I'm not even going to ask myself why.
Dude it was bad... like you fell asleep around the toilet after drinking from the back tank bad.
I think it would be reallllly cool if you took your best friend to work so she doesnt have to have an awkward cab ride with the driver she drunkenly made out with last night ...
Tequila ran out around 11 so she let them do body shots of chips and guacamole instead
I am at a point in my life where I don't want to brush my teeth for my tinder date because toothpaste and martinis don't mix.
They pay me enough to pretend to be either helpful, or heterosexual. If they want both I need one hell of a raise.
Apparently I offered the cop my Taco Bell.
Desperate times...
She unfriended me four minutes after we fucked. That must be some sort of record.
He took a shot of vodka and AND ATE ME OUT AS A CHASER. YESSS. I AM IN LOVE.
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