Topless wife handwashing shirt. Tonight marriage is good.
she starting giving me head in the taxi..the driver told her to stop..she looked up, said "I'm the birthday girl", and kept on doing what she was doing.
He lit his shirt on fire at the bar by putting a lit cigarette in the pocket to "save for later."
for me the strap perfect is like a chastity belt
What baked good do you think says thanks for being a great tutor, lets bang?
HE HAS A FUCKING TWIN. HE HAS A TWIN. I'M NOT DRUNK THERE IS TWO OF THEM.
Yea, remember to blow out the fire from flaming shots. Unless you want burnt lips. Just saying, I'm an example of ignorance and intoxication.
hungover and i feel like a burrito
like eating one or like you are one?
like i am one.
I got shot at today. If that doesn't get me at least a blow job I give up working on the south side
I replaced his Viagra pills with sleeping pills.
This is seriously fucking awkward. My favorite sex scene just started and my dad's still here. He offered me Cheetos.
I have one goal now that I am in the USA. To find a man I can fuck into marriage before my visa runs out.
You sat on me. Like I was a toilet. While I was on the toilet. You peed a little.
just found a joint on the street in downtown. smoked it with the hot guy from my chem class
WHAT IS UP WITH YOU SMOKING/ DRINKING THINGS OFF THE GROUND?
so does the amount of bruises on my arms and legs mean we had fun last night?
Randomize
