4:33 am: Sleep on left side of my bed. T-shirts are second drawer on left side, boxers top right. I don't wake up when lights are on so feel free in my room..
Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
Sorry I never got back to you. I got high. I know it sounds like a commercial or something... but its true
What wine goes with Cap'n Crunch?
My entire childhood was an ugly sweater party
I smelled my fingers after she left and they smelt like sugar cookies. I want that one again.
Her mom walked into the garage as we were smoking a kush blunt with sombreros on.
I like to keep a steady black out going for the holidays. I feel it makes me less cynical
There's scrapes on the inside of both my thighs.. Because we wanted to get drunk and climb trees naked.
I mean with a sentence like that I knew I would be cumming
I was stalking his twitter and saw that he used punctuation in a hashtag. Thank god we didn't work out because I can't be with someone that incompetent
I dropped a piece of Mac and cheese in the shower and I almost still ate it. Stoned, but not stoned enough to degrade myself.
Damn that sucks I haven't needed pants the whole time i've been here
I’m literally naked drinking a beer and I gotta leave in 6 minutes for work lol
I may or may not have been feeling patriotic and banged Captain America in a closet. SPOILER ALERT: We broke his shield
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