i told him i was sober and he walked away immediately.
She just asked me if I was going to kiss her cat goodby too... This is why we don't stay till last call.
If the EMT's ask later... I had 5 hour energy for breakfast and Four Loko for dinner... It might be important for them to know that
We had sex under a tree in his boss's backyard, then I hooked up with his best friend. I don't even care how I got home.
Lol I just left. He's funny and he's cute. Downside: he thinks he can outdrink us
How do the freshmen here NOT understand the tricks we are playing on them by now? Doesn't bode well for grad numbers. Idiots.
Heard in class today that they replaced our carpet in last years apartment because they couldn't get the smell out, dude we smoked way to much pot last year.
I remember doing shots of gin, then I have this strange memory of us making out in the womens room at waffle house.
I regret none of it.
No one is allowed to go to bed until all bottles are finished, I don't want to feel my face tongiht. Do you understand?
It was like something out of a fucked up fairy tale. He just crowdsurfed over to her while riding a keg, said "come sail with me", and then the crowd carried them off into the night. What.
Pretty sure I love my nipple piercing more than I'll love my children someday
He gave me an extra phone charger for the other side of the bed the other night. Is that love?
His mom let me come to his house for a Booty call at 4am. She even cooked us breakfast in the morning and told me im a better moaner than his girlfriend of 4yrs.
i'm sitting in my room 'bout to smoke a bowl. also, i found out that you don't need a permit to own a tiger in wisconsin, so we're buying one when we move in together.
I need you to know I’m weirdly very sexually attracted to Charlie Puth now
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