hell yes lets make some ravioli
You were telling me about how you were gonna marry him, have his children and name them all woodchip.
New low. Found an ant nibbling on my last xanax. Flicked it away and popped it in my mouth anyways.
Every time a guy reaches down to touch my vag, i feel really sorry for all the transgender girls who still have a penis there.
That's weird cause every time i feel a girls vag i feel way worse for all the guys who reached down there and got a penis.
Its way too early to be sitting naked at his dining room table...
We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
Got a basket, 50 condoms, some candy, 100 plastic eggs & my bunny costume. Campus will feel my wrath in 2 weeks
I just fucked my ex's ex's ex. Love quadrilateral complete
Trying to grind with crutches was not a success
I tried to lock you in the bathroom stall because you were too drunk. But you escaped from underneath, I gave up
Just saw a hooker eating a pastrami sandwich walking down beach blvd blowing kisses to traffic. My day = made
Your little brother is asking me for an "expert opinion" on his dick size.
The bend and snap? 98% success rate of getting attention. When used appropriately, it has an 83% rate of return on a dinner invitation.
Congrats on graduating and I'm in a cab and need someone to helps keeping me up, do you mind
Do normal couples celebrate occasions naked with Chicken McNuggets and BBQ sauce?
Randomize
