remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
You owe me 10 bucks. He wasnt in jail. Found him at 530 this morning when the smoke alarm went off. He passed out naked in the middle of cooking bacon. No idea where he was before that.
Buying $100 worth of beef jerkey sounded like a terrific idea last night.
oh but the power of the cock will take you to places you never been..i flew to hawaii once to sleep witha chick
We ended up on a hotel balcony in Daytona where she lured a seagull down with a pizza crust she found in her purse and preceded to grab it out of the air by it's neck.
do you really not remember him getting up at like 4am with a leaf blower running through the house and telling people to "WAKE THE FUCK UPPP"
PSA: Morning booty calls are no longer accepted after the hours of 6am when I've been drinking or before 11am when I have not. Your cooperation is appreciated.
I just fucked her in her boyfriends bathroom... he was in the room sleeping.
Topenga is going to be back on TV. Finally my fantasy of her being a milf in junior high has come full circle.
Holy shit, just saw a girl in the library smoking a bong disguised as a calculator
I walked into the living room this morning and he was there with 3 shots in a row. He said it was "tea time."
was his pinky out?
Freshly fucked must agree with my hair cause I've gotten compliments on it this afternoon
When creating your wedding guest list do you put the girl you & your fiance had a threesome with under your friends or his friends?
You threw him in the dryer?
He went in of his own accord. Mumbled something about experiencing the blossoming of popcorn.
Dude I cant right now. Were talking about pickles.
Randomize
