okay, prove you're not drunk to me. write 5 true sentences about me with correct grammar.
I am sober. Because I don't drunk. It is bad. People die. I like Domenico because o he bag women what up?
wait one more day. tuesday is my official "i hit on you and/or we hooked up this weekend" friend request day.
I'm not gonna not go for it, she's foreign and pulled a shotglass out of her thong.
So they're giving me a CT scan because I probably have a hernia. From getting a BJ from you. Really. This may be a pivotal moment in my decision to write a book about my life
im looking at burger kings website. there isnt one anywhere close to where we were last night. i think it was sent from heaven
The last thing I remember is sitting in a chair and him hand feeding me bell peppers
But I do know they give away thousands and thousands in booze
My liver has a boner
My head is pounding and I need an ice pack for my vag. Successful friendsgiving!
I just don't understand how she's willing to go through so much planning and effort just to get a dick inside of her
In the store looking for it now. They put the theatre/script section right next to the gay erotica section. Rude. Practical, but rude.
Sometimes I think he has a hidden camera in my vagina so he knows what I'm doing and saying at all times...
Wow just discovered I can communicate my favorite sex positions using only emojis god bless this age of technology
I have bruises all over my legs. Did I hit a car with my bike last night?
I think it's important to not involve Bar Food in any near future decisions.
Every time I download Tinder again, I hate myself a little more.
Randomize
