you're like a bully in the Christmas story
Just bought purple Ray Bans. If there was any small chance that I would ever have sex with women ever again, I just buried it.
he wrote Vegans should suck on cow dick on her wall with permanent marker. thats how he got the black eye
I just sold my mom a dimebag. Should I feel scared or sucessful?
Can you come over to my place and make up for the crap you called sex yesterday?
Good morning to you
I'd invite him but there's too many people who have fucked me going already
Their car went through the first bag of wine on the drive up...clearly 6 bags was not enough.
I saw he had me in his phone as "the fat twin"
Strip club for my birthday. And none of this discrimination shit. We're going to a guys one and girls one. Go get your singles.
did you come by the house last night? I found a half eaten corn dog in the mail box.. I just figured you were drunk and needed somewhere to crash, but your no where to be found. I'll I have is this corn dog. call me when you get this. I'm worried! --mom
Fucking in bar bathrooms doesn't count as "rushing things"
He's two decades older than you. Remember how you said you wish you lived in the 70s? HE DID.
I got dropped off at my house at like 1030. Woke up hugging a street cat I've never seen before. Ended up drinking 260 oz of beer. 65 types. Then went out after blehhhhhh
I'm mainly pissed because I shaved fucking EVERYTHING for this. WITH SHAVING CREAM. Men do not appreciate how rarely that happens.
I wasn't that gone.
Dude, you cried and said how sorry you were when we asked why you had the dip.
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