This old guy in denny's is sitting alone and he is looking at us and laughing for no reason
i would rim the shit out of meg ryan
BEES IN MY FUCKING PANTS. HELP.
he suggested i make a website called "cum on molly's face", to "start off my acting career"
is he apposed to sex in general? or just porch sex?
Guess who left Professor Cunt on their paper by accident?
Crappy Mother's Day to you! Those of us who don't have children fill the void with hot sex, sleeping in, more sex, leisurely suntanning, foreign travel, overseas sex, paying cash for sports cars, watching TV, having sex on the floor in front of TV porn, lounging around the house, or whatever the hell we want.
Jailed a totally belligerent hot guy. That was probably my most thorough pat down. Ever.
If a treadmill opens up I'll run next to him and then fall off so he has to give me mouth to mouth
Congrats on graduating and I'm in a cab and need someone to helps keeping me up, do you mind
I got titty fucked last night and you're breastfeeding your newborn. Clearly we have gone two totally different paths since 2011.
If I don't answer right away it's because I took an Adderall and the fridge needs cleaned.
I just got promised sex at a fire station tonight so basically all my porn star dreams are coming true.
I just walked in on Joel doing a buck naked tripod headstand in front of the mirror so he could see the bug bite on his balls
I'm like the total package- I don't want a relationship and I have daddy issues. What more could he want?
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