i think i just heard my dad finish in the other room...
i just saw someone crawling up the stairs to the dorm while screaming "i have the best vagina!"
Is it weird I want to fuck the cartoon chick from e-surance??
If a "boob" guy and an "ass" guy are discussing which you are better qualified for....just let them
By the way, thank you for feeding me fries when I was sitting on the floor.
You're going to the beach with me so we can have beach sex whether you like it or not. Get over it. Kthx.
that's just what you get for learning massage techniques from gay porn
IT IS CHRISTMAS EVE AND I AM SUPPOSED TO BE HAVING SEX WITH AN ATTRACTIVE BLACK MAN IN THE NEXT FEW DAYS AND I JUST GOT MY PERIOD. WHEN PEOPLE ASK ME WHY I DON'T BELIEVE IN GOD I WILL TELL THEM OF THIS DAY.
My goal is to be drunk before we even get out of the No Wake Zone.
There is absolutely a 0% chance my hips will make it out of this twerking business fully functional
She's licking the whiskey out of the carpet. I think we may be soulmates.
We woke up on vday and got high and played frisbee in our living room for a couple hours and then had sex. It was probably the most romantic valentine's day i've ever had
He has a bear rug in his room. I'm going to ask if we can have sex on it. Wilderness sex.
he said to "slap him" after he guessed the time correctly. i did.
it's okay that you two hooked up in the family bathroom at the mall.. i just pray to god you were not making a family in the family bathroom..
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