I lined up everyone's pillows and I'm playing Evel Knievel when I jerk off later.
I love the moment a guy admits defeat against the front clasping bra.
As I was going down on her I noticed she had a tatoo on her inner thigh that said "Eat it like your birthday cake".
I'm listening to bach and watching porn,is that a sign of depression?
Quite the contrary. Sophistication.
The story about him having a girlfriend changed real fast when he found out that I was a gymnast
he just kept saying "come on iron man, you can do this!" to himself the whole time..
I'm not holding out much hope. She met me in a nighclub when I was arguing with the cigarette machine
i don't care if its just a preseason game, my pick up a guy and suck him off in the bathroom skills are in midseason form
You just want to fuck a girl in a dinosaur costume, don't you?
in line at jewel. the cashier is puking in a garbage can while ringing up customers. glad to know im not the only one that 2012 is kicking in the face already.
I hate it when fuck holes buy me drinks at the bar. You don't know my order. You don't know me. You don't know where I've been. You don't know my life.
Living in the dorms has served one purpose and one purpose only for me: to teach me that pooping in public bathrooms is okay and that I can do it
Dang. We need a girls trip ASAP. Preferably in a country who has even lower standards than us on a Friday night.
Just had to break it to that one guy that I can't sleep w him bc he looks identical to my brother. So how's your morning?
we've dated a week and made out twice. he is taking it slow. but his body is stupid sexy. just want him to stop respecting me and fuck me like a gutter slut. respect me later im not getting younger.
Randomize
