I heard Topanga got a DUI. I need that mugshot asap.
he wanted me to dress up like someone from lord of the rings. I dumped him.
he wanted to have sex on the little rocking chair but i was too high to figure out how to do that so we did it on the floor.
oh yeah I know that guy. he's legit. slept in my closet a few times
I went to class with the sex aroma on me. The hot sun doesn't help much.
i love being in ibiza. their hotels are much more receptive to walking around naked in the lobby than our american ones.
And im sorry for wishing your girlfriend gets genital warts.
Fact: Chilis at the airport in JAX will serve you shots of jack at 6:45 with breakfast. Ya I missed my flight.
So when does your new flight leave?
At my shot/hour ratio.... I leave in 16 shots. I love flying
Can we skip lunch and do power hour sex time from now on? I'll let you eat nachos off my body if you really need the food.
Know what was probably a bad idea? Using white wine as a mixer for vodka.
I'm eating ramen over the toilet. Fuck my life
I just asked her to come in through the window, this pretty much solidifies the whole fuck-buddy thing...
I felt guilty, it was so good!
Guilty? Oh great, I give the Jewish mother-in-law of blowjobs.
Lol if he questions who I am I'm gonna send him a pic of his boxers
sorry for running off in the middle of that heart to heart. free food.
Randomize
