My clean wipe streak was ended today by two enchiladas and a can of refried beans. dammit i should have been more cautious. thanks for all ur encouragement and support.
We learned a valuable lesson from last night. You can, in fact, order bacon on a Big Mac.
I just smoked pot in front of my old Elementary School. It's like my Childhood and Adulthood are coming together in this awesome thing.
Writing a love song to planned parenthood. what rhymes with "don't have AIDS"
I can feel the alcohol in my calves
I'm the only one who goes to a bar and leaves with an extra twenty bucks and a pumpkin.
You told her that she shouldn't be allowed to wear clothes then when her roommate asked if you like her you said "no I just want to insert things into her"
I stand by it.
Is the party worth it?
I am drink. Beer pony and singing.
Also I played a weird game of chicken in the ladies room at work between myself the person pooping 2 stalls over and a very determined maintenance man.
When I was hooking up with this guy last night all I could think about was if we were in Game of Thrones... I need to stop doing drugs
All she has to do is text me and my dick gets hard. It doesn't matter what it's about. Last text was about a homeless dude
She just walked out of her bedroom naked and asked me to help put her diaper on. Yeah, that pretty much sums up the last 24 hours...
I know you're having some issues right now but can we focus on the gangbang?
just bought safety googles to wear so he can cum on my face and not in my eye. SAFETY FIRST!
Andddddd I'm drunk
Andddddd it's Tuesday
That's your opinion.
Randomize
