Bad idea. College students cannot afford both alcohol and a cat. Unless said cat is irish, and can feed itself with fifths of whisky.
Also, I'd like to add that that I'm not quitting my job, my boss fed me shots at 11 am this morning.
I somehow ended up with a bottle of red wine in one hand and white in the other and would drink them at the same time. Ruined
Rachel and his cat watched us 69 last night. I pretended to be embarrassed the next day... But to be honest I like an audience
I can already see the regret in her eyes. Amazing night. This city rules.
I SMOKED SO MUCH I SKIPPED A DAY.
I wanna come do a blessing for your apartment. And by that I mean I want to drink a lot of whiskey and watch ancient aliens in your apartment
She kept calling herself DJ McDonalds and said she wanted to make some Egg McMusic.
What if for Halloween I paint my self gold and make sandwiches for everyone? I'd be a trophy wife! Get it?
But don't thank me for faking being asleep, if I was the real wing man, I would have left the bed
Are you feeling better yet?
I need a nap and a new butthole
Just got home, my brothers stoned and he got a high score on COD.. He just asked me if I wanted to have a celebrational yogurt with him. Wtf?
Well, I have no idea where my underwear is, so yea I would say it was a good weekend.
where are you guys?
stoned at his house watching water boil
You went after him with a sword while screaming “FAJITAS!”. And Todd was dressed as a Goth for some reason
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