Three words: puerto rican gang bang
singing james blunt while drunk. tell me thats not wonderful
Fucked her within an inch of her life. Seriously. Don't choke bitches when they ask. Was way too drunk to be pulling that shit.
He just helps fat girls get exercise. One walk of shame at a time.
He introduced himself to me as "the gayest gay who ever gayed." I like him already.
he found cum stains on my sheets and all i could blurt out was "better on the sheets than in me"
I'm giving great sideboob & it's being wasted on my parents.
He fucking took my shirt off and didn't even touch my boobs. What the actual fuck.
Well I guess I'll go shower now and wash all the stripper off.
he sneezed into my face mid-kiss
Bless his heart
Just found out that my name comes from part of my mom's old stripper name.
2016 is coming through for me, I'm renaming it the year of great dick
THAT'S MY GIRL
KICKING BUT AND GETTING PEOPLE INTOXICATED
like sometimes I wish I was allergic to latex so I wouldn't have sex with so many people..
Intoxication Level: I'm as graceful and flawless as a fucking dinosaur.
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