so last night was fun and all.. but you might want to get tested
just walked past a group of stoners who were staring open jawed in the spice aisle. tonight they will stumble upon something amazing.
its not that she doesnt like having sex with you, your balls just smell worst then your ass.
Its like a relationship where they cockblock each other.
We left your bucket of puke on your doorstep to clean out yourself. You're welcome.
She had me dip my balls in cake batter ice cream from cold stone and then tea bag her. Let's get weird just got a whole new meaning.
I'm not saying you did or didn't sleep with him but he's has your thong hanging from his ceiling fan
well i don't NEED my liver but it's nice to have one when you're trying to have a good time
I want to get a list going called "D list celebs I've kissed"
He just went to a job interview a sharpie moustache drawn on his face..
I had a dream involving the worlds smallest pony, an asphalt volcano, and jimi hendrix. Never smoking 3 bowls before bed again
We went there specifically for you to break it off with him and I walk in on you two in the bathroom with his dick in your mouth
but he had pizza... so i win
I give up.
I am now banned from the bar... Because you got head from my ex in the woman's restroom
we used a blowdryer last night to warm up our left over pizza..it worked perfectly at first..but then the chili powder got into his eyes..
I totally fucked your pastor last night.
You're his wife.
Still a dirty get down.
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