Please tell me you did not just serenade her with "Let's Get it On"?
Yeah I think it worked. My penis thanks you, Captain Morgan.
I think you should know he took my pants (buttons and zippers included) and my thong off with his mouth alone. I found my husband
you were the other women for BOTH people in the relationship?
getting caught by my parents in bed with another guy was way easier coming out than telling them over dinner like I had planned.
FYI : beer farts in the morning chase women right out of bed!
I tried to explain to him that we just wanted a stereotypical black friend to be in our group. He didn't take it too well... Never take me to the bar again.
So... i mean if they do have cameras in his apartment buildings pool room atleast we gave them a little show.
You should've come to the party. It was like an identity parade of everyone you screwed last year.
She said she forgot something.. and when she came out she was carrying a garden gnome, and a bottle of vodka. she was too hot to question it.
you walked in, put on rap music and started chugging vodka
Yay! Also. When you're coming down eat waffles and touch yourself. You won't regret it.
I almost had sex in a public restroom last night in case you're wondering how much of a mess 22 is for me
I'm at 45 minutes post orgasm, and I still feel my insides spasming. Pretty sure I just fucked Superman.
I'm having shoppers remorse over a dildo
Hey, what's the French word for when you meet your boyfriend's friend and you have that gut feeling that you smoked pot naked in a hot tub with him at a house party years ago?
Randomize
