just next time i won't let coke make me think I'm superman and drink a shit ton.
:)
Wipe that smile off your face.
I just caught myself doing the gator chomp to my tv. I need to get laid.
Just used my last prints at the library for brackets instead of final reviews. Hello March.
He sent me an email apologizing for sleeping with her...and by that I mean he sent a picture of his dick to my school e-mail
someone who i have in my phone as thundercock just said he was DTF
I take back all the times I've said life was unfair. I'm about to have two trained bartenders for a girlfriend and roommate
he asked me to "shake his dick" when he introduced himself, playing naked football with you in our living room. $100 says you two get married one day.
A nice make out session never hurt anyone. Plus he's a pilot, so he'll know the safety procedures for when the night crashes and burns.
I'll be home soonish I need 4th of July sex, it's the American thing to do.
What the World Series means to me is that I've slept with too many giants fans.
I'm storing dick pics, so basically if I'm still single after residency...ur gonna get bombarded. It's gonna be a blizzard of dicks.
Feel free to keep your blizzard of dicks to yourself.
So about that you can bill me for the chair but it was David's idea to jump from the window sill into the washer with "clothing pillows of cloudiness" to land on to get ahold of him you have to phone his mother
I just talked to her she really hates you like a lot
Question: anytime during the past week did I drunk dial you and give you full permission to grab my boobs? Cus I know I said it I just don't remember who I said it to...
is it still considered wake n bake if you wake up at 2 pm?
Randomize
