woke up to find a pram in the balcony. first thing we did was look over the edge!
dude, she masturbates with a ken doll.
Do you think most people who work at an airport Chili's can pin point where their lives went wrong?
you grabbed his arm with one hand and the bottle of smirnoff with the other and headed off to your room you were on a mission
Yeah Greg found him eating out of a tuna can with a pill cap
I was changing in front of my window and my neighbor text me saying, "nice pubes."
I need an adult. someone more adult than my current state
I think I caught your cold through my vagina. It was worth it.
I'll pass on that plan. The lack of my penis in new vaginas is no where on the itinerary.
holy fucking shit get me out of here. even the babies are wearing beanies
I just want some dick and chicken fingers please advise
This bird just went for my eyes. Does he think I'm dead???
sometimes you just have to listen to beyonce and cry. that's how life works
LACE UP YOUR GODDAMN SHOES
N O
You tryed convincing the salvation army bell ringer you could do the worm and face planted into the sidewalk... I put a dollar in the can for your performance
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