she quoted hannah montana in her facebook status. i will never be speaking to her in person again.
Beer is about to convince me to do something really stupid.
Afterwards she kept poking it and saying "it looks so sad and small" I dont know if I wanted to reach this state in our relationship...
his mom called while we were having sex and asked if we could finish in his brothers room because her ceiling fan was about to fall on her bed
i just saw some one pass a baby through the drive-thru window at dairy queen.
What's the wine called that we really like and we usually drink it with xanax?
well the hot one passed out so thats that, but then the fat one made chicken nuggets....totally worth it
just tried to pee in the sink at wendys...need to stop letting my drunk habits get into my sober life
Woke up in an unfamiliar pair of underwear, running shoes but no socks, and a cowboy hat. Thank you crown royal
Such a good question, let's ask the alcohol gods for the answer.
if you're the one who put those dollar bills in my bra last night, thank you because I just used that money to get myself a coffee
Pussy, Peanut Butter Cookies,and Bubble Wrap
Wasted. And I have 5 pounds of potatoes that I'm responsible for.
He showed up in a Prius. I didn’t even wanna.... So I left.
Either im seeing the northern lightgs, someone is having a rave, or im on acid.. Im most likely on acid
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