Sooo i definitely have a major burn on my chin from kenny's ...stubble from making out for hours while coked up. Pure class.
If everyone lived like me, we would need 5.9 earths. Fuck yes america.
So what if i'm late to spanish tomorrow. who the hell cares. i don't even speak spanish.
Just found out you can rent the rollerena for 100 bucks and you can bring your own beer... when are you free this week?
Well, technically I had a shirt on, it was just around my waist.
he proposed by singing a showtune... he might as well have had a cock in his mouth at the time
I just saw an appointment in my phone called "it's been a month" I think I drunkly did that after I slept with Paul to remind myself to check if I got knocked up... I'm smarter drunk than sober.
Hardcore start to spring break. Mike is wearing adult diapers because the only stop we are making is for gas.
The straight guy here is hot. He described himself as Christian grey without the money and my vagina fell out of my body
pray to the hookup gods
I'm trying to blow this guy down here can you please get my husband out of the house.
Most people would agree that it IS in fact slutty to give someone head for free ice cream.
We all just got ice cream, condoms, and toilet paper now were gonna go home and watch movies as a family.
Condoms?
its like probably shouldnt be sending pics of your asshole to strangers who work in the same building as you
I could hear it slapping against his thighs under the robe!!!!!!!!! You are a lucky girl!
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