I don't think brook has ever known best
How the hell am I supposed to know what lotion to get her? They should have a dressing booth where I could go test how good it is for jerking off, then I'd know.
I think I left a blow job at your house. Can I come down and get it?
I gave it to your brother to give to you.
They refer to his house as "the abortion clinic". Cant wait.
I'm sober in pajamas at a bar. Nothing is ok about that statement.
Been home for 3 days and already spiked coffee with Kahlua. Only 106 till we go back to school
I lost a little respect for your boyfriend when I learned that he has a scar from a Cheerio.
I woke up to him yelling "WHO SLEEPS WITH A BEER IN THEIR HAND?!?" this of course, startled me awake and made me spill the aforementioned beer. So I guess the a answer is- not this girl, not anymore. Asshole
Just because you can put your penis in it does not make it "good stuff".
I just sent him 3 long ass texts about how to tell a girl how he feels. I should get a fucking friend zone medal.
I will make you one.
Good. It needs "forever alone" engraved on it
I always make inappropriate sexual decisions during the holidays
I'm kind of upset that he wanted to have sex instead of watch Harry Potter. I mean it's Harry fucking potter.
Well I'm nervous now about the consequences of letting you loose
It's a big decision, I respect that you need to think about it.
you know you're sexually deprived when you're holding a warm taquito in your hand and your vagina starts to tingle
Hey man, he's too drunk to remember what you said. What drugs are we buying and when should we expect them?
Randomize
