on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
he just found out his girl is having a boy. he's probably googling "Ed Hardy diapers" as we speak.
Margaritas ran out of lime juice. Substituted Jaeger. Jaegerita not good.
im at that stage where all she has to do is cough or something and it pisses me off
Note to self: Not getting laid all weekend makes girls in mondays classes racks seem enormously bigger.
dude i just figured out that the tostitos sign is two people eating chips and salsa. being high totally pays off sometimes
Just made a PowerPoint called "Reasons Why You Should Fuck Me" at his request. The sad thing is we've had sex before...
When Vanessa's kindergarten teacher called me in because she was caught with her hand down some boys pants in the bathroom, I knew you babysat last week.
I may have played more drinking games with my family this last week than all of freshman year...
Did you blackout Saturday before or after we had sex in a random snow bank?
I vote we get high and sneak off to McDonald's to get mcflurries.
YES. ALL MY YES.
somebody should make me the poster child for not drinking everclear..
someone stole all your weed so you told us you were planning each of our deaths
We stopped mid-sex and both shotgunned a beer then got back to it. Is this what love feels like?
I'M IN A SPINNING VORTEX OF SELF-HATRED AND HORNINESS
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