he quoted Bring It On. It's over.
I'm drinking early times at a fridays on wednesday night. This entire bar is going to see my dick by last call.
My flask crushed my baggie full of aderall in my backpack, why can't my demons just live together in peace
I'm starting to think The only feelings I have anymore are drunk and hung over
you can't hurt those
she walked in on me snorting my prozac. there was no way to convince her i was doing a good thing.
ALTON JUST DID GRAVY SHOTS. THIS IS WHY HE'S MY HERO
Chasing shots by shotgunning beers is not a good idea.
I feel like an ass. I'm not blacking out ever again. I want to clean your feet for a year. Just like Jesus did.
Drunk me needs to be reminded of my sexual preferences.
at least it wasnt animals
nothing worse than walking out of class after 3 hours and having covered exactly zero information
walking out with herpes. that would be worse
I just want every freshman guy to know about Grindr just so I can have more options
There's nothing quite like having a little 8 year old boy hand me a Bible on campus while I'm on my way to the health center because of my recent slutty tendencies.
The council and I are about to open up a bottle of malort.
UPGATe: THE COUNCIL AND I HAVE AGREED TO BAHN MALORT FROM THE HOUSEHOLD
Guess who's the proud owner of her very own foxtail butt plug!!
This is a test message to see whether or not the recipient is alive.
Randomize