I made my friend ***** cry when I wouldn't let her call u for an orgy at 3am...I didn't think you'd be to happy being woke up
It wasn't until i was on my knees with three dicks in my face that i thought it might be a bad idea
Apparently I kept telling people I was a pro tennis player again...
i think i had to give the cab driver my id to get home last night because i couldnt talk.
Nuts. Absolutely nuts. she just screamed in my face something about not knowing whats happening and then got tackled by a dude
My cab driver just suggested I brush my teeth because he can smell "the party" on me.
I am the sex elephant in the room. Again.
I just need a text that says "put that food down bitch" and then maybe I'll lose water weight through tears
I had to rip your toilet paper for you...
I feel like death crawled up inside me and died. That sick
I'm sorry, you're actually right. Ostrich racing happens, and they're ridden like a horse. Bewildered and distraught.
I SWEAR TO GOD IF SHE FUCKS WITH OUR GOLD GENE POOL
did you just correct my grammar and then send me a photo of your dick?
I wanna suck that fisherman's dick.
So nothing to worry about, but i'm probly going to jail soon, just thought i should let you know so you didn't worry. Bye!
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