the easter KEGG...out of a drunken typo there arose a new and spectacular holiday tradition
Sorry about the voicemail last night, people in hostel thought getting the clap from cheating on me wasn't enough and you hearing a 6 foot 5 Swedish dude bang the shit out of me was needed.
I just typed in random letters on his address bar... 5 out of the 6....a porn site was in the drop down list hahahahaha get a life bro.
I have no idea. I think this is what happens when people take drugs in the middle of the day
I just told him he had gained a new brother. He immediately knew I meant the eskimo kind.
I can feel the judgmental stares of Christians from around the world right now.
Im coming down to miami this weekend
We shall drink from the everclear river
I'm sitting outside your room listening for sex noises eating pepperoni...slowly
Come now. I'm bloody but I'll give you the best fuck of your life.
After what I experienced at 6am this morning, all I can say is chew your noodles thoroughly.
Was it you I was with where I saw a guy open a beer with his butt?
let me assure you that a rugburn on your forehead is the worst side effect of tequila i have experienced to date.
Had to clear my browser history. I figured if she used the search bar and her name came up, it might be a little creepy.
Man, I'm never going tanning again he noticed the burns on my ass
Now all my porn is stored in my parents’ basement. It’s like a part of my soul is boxed up
Randomize