How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
i flashed his best friends last night
you always were good at making good first impressions
i'm not sure if i'm mentally prepared for this.. politeness? proper grammar? book reader ? this is a whole new meaning of the species penis for me.
Do you remember using the heel of your shoe as a shish kabob stick? You offered me some chicken, but I declined.
you should be awarded for your promiscuity.
i really should.
no dont worry i changed into my costume in the hospital bathroom
I hate having to put a bra on before I go home cuz I have to pretend I actually went to class today
Yeah I'm just gonna shower and drink a gallon of coffee and drunkenly write my research paper. It'll be fine
My butthole probably tastes like a Cinnabon right now
for once I'd like a one night stand where I don't meet the guys mom or wife in the morning
I've never had someone have to dis-arm themselves before I sucked their dick prior to that
Listen this is important.. if I die tonight you have to be the drug dealer at my funeral
I just had mom give me advice about how and where to store my lube in my shower. It was super awkward. Of course, she also walked in on me masturbating once so I guess turnabout is fair play
If I say I hate myself for it does it make it any better?
Upstairs definitely just had sex while I wrote you love poetry. That was a fun experience 🤷🏻♀️
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