i don't like sucking hair
So she puts out... but it wasn't worth it
you hand the children out the window. i'll pour the drinks.
if we break up, blackout me is coming back, making out with everything in sight
Just so everyone's clear, it was already on fire when I got there.
Oh my god. My pre-date bowl for nerves tuned into "I'm too high for this date" he kept talking about trucks and I couldn't stop making racial slurs.
if creating a fake 8 year old brother, who lives with me and has had mono for the past month, to explain why I have ignored my group project members is wrong, then I... well then I'm probably going to hell
I totally gave him head in sync to Beastie Boy's Sabotage playing in the background.
Naw, the sex dungeon had to come down so we could build a nursery. Cause and effect really.
I smell like thanksgiving dinner and bad decisions. Its not even thanksgiving yet.
I literally cut myself out of my pants. What is my life.
Serious question, on a scale of go for it to what the fuck are you thinking, what's me going to a monk or any religious official and saying "baptize me daddy" in a serious voice?
He showed up on school grounds wearing nothing but a suit of armor. Really at this point I'm more impressed than angry.
My booty call made my bed while I was in the shower. I may have to marry him.
Worst sex ever! He was a talker for sure! I was on top and out of no where he said "Oh you bad bitch?" I stopped and left.
Randomize
