What happened to our ballroom dancing plans
so while we were having sex, he stuck it in my but, and when he finished he goes next time can we have anal. i don't know if that means im tight or my butt hole is loose, i choose to think the first one
my love horoscope just told me to "say it in frosting" should i take this literally?? i think yes.
I think I just puked all over my comforter and my roomdmate won't wakt up to washc it for me
It' a whole new level of walk of shame. I'm carrying his sheets since I have a washer/dryer.
So I cleaned out my gym bag. Found half a bottle of malibu.
You know, I could pretend I'm shocked but what's the use?
That awesome feeling when you are pooping on the same toilet that nobel laureates have pooped on
You installed a beer holder in the shower?! You're the best roommate ever!
... That's a shower caddy.
I believe this is a toe-mate-toe vs. toe-maut-toe situation.
Watch out, there's a giant vagina in the quad running around screaming at people.
Thanks for coming over. I'm sorry everyone else was vomiting. Thank you for not vomiting. I love you.
DO NOT TOUCH THE SOAP ITS HAD SOME UNORTHODOX USES WITHIN THE PAST 15 HOURS
Went home with a guy last night with Taco Bell sauce in my hair and on my pants
She moved all of her stuff out while we were gone. Shit in the toilet, and didn’t flush. So yeah it went well.
I wish u could call a dildo. Like you do a missing cell phone.
When he identified himself as captain clitoris i knew my night was fucked.
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