There are 3 speedbumps now up. Think you can manage the urge to piss on them?
Aw shit! That's like putting me a in a room full of Captiain Crunch Donuts and Jasper Hale and not letting me put my mouth on either.
I just didn't expect you to be so naked....
is the fantasy fufillment of sex in a hot tub worth the possible infection?
It's offcial there's a Bobby Light radio station on pandora.
we found a loaf of bread in my bathroom i believe its yours. sorry i took a shower before we noticed so it might be soggy
Found a beard hair in my crotch.... care to explain?
styled my pubes into a mustache as a surprise. Thought you should know
Look man, sometimes you just gotta say "Sure! Why not? I can always take a shower afterwards"
My cat clawed my face because i tried to give it a foot massage...never doing shrooms again.
My dad, when he got home and saw me loading a bowl in the living room: "We have TWO beautiful balconies to get high on and you pick the couch?!"
I feel like as your wife, as cool with your decision-making skills as I usually am, there should be a bigger explanation to you adopting a child while I'm in Houston.
I don't understand or I understand perfect - if were not talking about fried chicken I'm not sure what's happening.
Our group of friends now have more broken bones than reasonable excuses for why they're broken.
I knew my bag made it because I could smell the fireball that spilled inside of my suitcase before it was on the luggage carousel.
Turns out the guy I did all that coke with the other night is a cop
We're dating now
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