There was a fist fight in my basement last night at four in the morning, in case you were wondering
toast her oven
toast her strudel
inspect her gadget
You dropped me off at the wrong girl's house.
There's no such thing as a "wrong girl" make it happen.
alright see you in the morning.
its summer. and we all know college gfs do not count in summer.
college gfs dont count ever. theyre like getting corn rows in jamaica. you feel cool at the time. then you go home and people make fun of you.
she'd have to be at LEAST a cup size bigger for me to even consider putting up with her voice
You going to midnight mass? we need a dd
Today in class was pretty awsome. I dont feel like i have to throw up and im actually paying attention. This is a first for friday
we can fight about whose fault it is later....naked.
Worst part of blacking out... Waking up and having to do the teeth check
Why am I always the sober one?
Cause you're the only one with any sort of self control. It's kinda your super power...
I was laying there trying to sleep and then he sat up, took out his dick, and put it on my shoulder. It wasn't even hard- it was just casually perched.
You were chugging tap water out of a running blender screaming "bubbles is Perrier mother fucker"
So he came on my stomach this morning and I totally forgot about it until after you poured that body shot.
This summer has already been like the best summer ever. FREEDOM IS AWESOME. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND GOD BLESS THE SINGLE LIFE.
My vagina has a mind if its own. Can you imagine if I didnt have you to run her ideas through.
Randomize
