you know he's having a sex change. I can't believe you called him "titty man" to his face....
he would probably call me "ma'am" when he's inside me. people love saying weird shit inside me.
Is it bad that I was more upset about not getting the perfume he told me he had bought for me then the actual breakup?
How do you say "I always respond to booty calls" when you give a guy your number?
just witnessed some guy trade his friend $5 and a condom for his keys.
I can't wait for round whatever # we're on tonight.
This is davidson friend mat i an drunk. Thank you for having a physical relationship. With David. I bet he gas a penis the size of an elephant tusk. You are a lucky lady.
You have all of her herpes and none of my sympathy
I ate the last cupcake. I'm sorry. It was in the refrigerator mocking me. So I ate it. And it was glorious. But I'm sorry.
All I see when I think of you are dancing penis angels around your head.
Well. Now I feel like I put pants on for nothing.
The guy whose house were at is drunkenly reading green eggs and ham to us in German
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
he'll eat me out, but god forbid we double dip when sharing salsa
He broke through his window then signed his name on the biggest peice of glass from it. I think they framed it and named it 'best party ever'
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