oh i have no idea about his personality. i imagine it's the same as it was- except now combined with a receding hairline and a beer gut
Get here now. This is going to be possibly my most dangerous idea ever, and I'm the guy who challenged a hobo to a breakdance fight.
I had to hold off a girl who was trying to check your pulse while you were passed out. She kept screaming that she was a nursing major and needed to make sure you were alive.
You told the entire McDonalds staff that I was a whore and that you didn't want your french fries cooked.
Have you asked your drug dealer if he wants to see harry potter with you?
I'm so busy i barely have time to have sex with myself. I have to talk myself into it like an old married couple.
Do you think dominoes pizza would deliver faster if I told them I just had shower sex and that always makes me hungry?
A penis isn't a time share. I want to own not rent.
The chances of me making out with someone next weekend are about the same as me not remembering it.
Do they still have sex clubs in San Francisco? Because that'd be an interesting way to spend Easter.
In hindsight, I probably should not have let the waiter give me a chiropractic adjustment on my neck last night.
Bringing my mom Taco Bell and weed. I'm such a good daughter
Im selling my dirty underwear to pay for that cruise. NO JUDGEMENT . I love you lol ❤❤ also dont tell anyone
So I almost broadcasted the porn from my phone to the boardroom chrome cast
Holy shit dude........stairs
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