Cops are here now. U need to come back. Ur not under arrest. But u need to apologize to the woman for what you did to her cat.
When she gives birth, I'm so playing 'Eye of the Tiger'
It was like some kind of slut recycling operation. She gave me the shirt of the last guy she slept with in exchabge for mine so I didn't have to wear the same thing to work. She's been doing it for years
Hhahaha he is. Omg the new polish friend just took his pants off in front of me. There is something wrong with this nationality.
THAT IS NOT SOMETHING YOU TELL SOMEBODY THE FIRST TIME YOU MEET THEM IN THE DARK.
Beer and cheesecake and spinning in cirlcles why did you let me do this to myself
scream really loud. we think you crawled under the deck
Guess who just got out of a ticket because the cop liked her costume? THIS GIRL.
The fact that he said "there's nothing wrong with being a raging drunk, just ask my mother." has me thinking that I have no positive role-models among my friends.
It's like the first time your mom catches you masturbating. We both know what she saw. We're just not talking about it...
I gave the bike taxi guy a blowjob because I didn't have any cash. College.
Do it break your family into faction start a civil war
I think you threw up on me last night but i can't remember so i'm not mad at you.
I made out with the hosts' boyfriend, infront of her, drank way too much, slept in my car and convinced everyone that I'm really a nice person. If that's not skilled lying, I don't know what is.
No problem...what are friends for if they can't rub eachothers genitals.
Randomize
