sticking your finger down your throat to make yourself throw up is bulimia, not morning sickness, so no, I don't think you're pregnant.
if every girl in minneapolis isn't pregnant when i get back to the cities i will cry
It's summer and yet I still can't have one library session w/o seeing someone who has had their penis in me.
You said that "grilled cheese was much to complex" and started to throw the buttered bread at the wall while eating all the cheese.
Your CAR. Is in a LAKE. I'd say "a big mess" is a pretty conservative description of the situation.
We need to step up our tailgating...they're here drinking out of a prosthetic leg
He's getting off drug court. We're doing a super-blunt with 50 dollars worth stuffed inside. He almost cried tears of joy when we told him.
I have a breathe right strip stuck to my forehead, several inexplicable bruises and I think someone tried to paint my nails with glue, but I still have my Santa hat. I'm gonna call this one a success.
You tripped over nothing.. everyone stopped what they were doing and stared..you stood up and yelled "you win this time gravity"..then started chugging someone's drink
I would like to dedicate my cray behavior this week to my uncontrollable hormones and wine. Both have totally Efff'ed with my life.
Came so hard my ears popped. This lovely piece of news and pissin in my driveway brought to you by rum
The fact that it was "anything but a cup" now explains the cowboy boots and fishbowl aftermath at the apartment.
As I was puking, these 2 guys started peeing next to me chanting me on
Well I just took a pregnancy test... So how's your thanksgiving?
I'm having shoppers remorse over a dildo
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