We may have a problem that even dr. phil cant solve
Just come over and take your pants off. 35 mins tops. You'll be home before midnight cinderella
Just got an Edible Arrangement my parents sent me for my birthday. Time to marinate some fruit in vodka.
I don't remember anything other than how good it felt when I peed my pants.
I think I have internal bruising from those poses we were doing last night. My own ribs hurt me. I don't understand.
Help. Me. He just whispered 'prepare yourself', & sprayed hairspray everywheres to make sure the 'air was crisp'
It's barely 9 am & I've already had an ice cube IN my vagina
WHAT THE FUCK. SUCH A BAD IDEA. YOU'RE NO LONGER IN CHARGE OF NOSE SUBSTANCES.
My dad just bought me a 40. I consider this our peace treaty.
I just took two shots of Burnerts out of a ladle. Get here now.
It's becoming clear to me that I am not sugar baby material. I don't think I could handle old balls long term.
not being a booty call is very strange. Who knew there was so much time for activities at night!
I feel asleep with my contacts in, with my arms wrapped around a bottle of vodka. Also... Do we have class today?
Btw I puked in your glovebox
He was eating me out on a picnic table on the frame lake trail and right after I came, a group of hikers walked around the corner. Stood up just in time
And this is one of the many reasons why you need a car.
Randomize
