that's not even the weird part though. he already knew where the bathroom was, he might have been here before..
He kept his baseball cap on when he went down on me...
just peed on the 7/11 floor and casually left. Omg so drunk
Her roommate "grounded" her because she drunkenly tried to fill their fish tank with vodka
Fell down the metal stairs and some guy tried to fight me after you left. I fell asleep with cadbury eggs in my mouth too.
Road trip to buy me a baby zebra..are you in or are you in?
rigging a system to keep my jello shots cold in class. important election day work.
Im currently watching two girls making out. In the library. Hope your studying is going as good as mine is. Haha
Having to grow a landing strip to cover the bruises from pole dancing. Thanks for the birthday present, but next time, maybe just a gift card?
Dilemas of the modern woman: deciding whether or not to write on your ex's wall for his birthday. This is serious.
I've discovered my ability to crush a man's ego is greater than my hate for beer.
Is her dick bigger than yours?
WHO TURNS DOWNA FRESHLY WAXED VAGINA IN A MAIDS COSTUME LITERALLY LAYING IN YOUR BED
My girl friends dad just asked how I get so drunk and then he passed out with a bloody Mary in his hand on the couch it's 230 do you know where your parents are
The only thing i ask you for is vegan food and sex.
Randomize
