The whole way homeyou were flapping your arms up and down, and when I asked why you said you were trying to tell Tony Danza about the angels.
A lesson I learned in the hospital....when you masturbate while attached to a heart monitor, it scares the nurses a lot.
I have another pimple on my ass cheek.
I'll be there in 10 minutes.
so high i just made my own version of grilled cheese using toast and spray cheese
here comes the puke
btw when he was trying to sleep i was apparently poking him in the face w my 'flipper' slurring random manatee facts
I vaguely remember walking down the highstreet with a plate of K offering lines to passers buy. I sold a line to a taxi driver.
I action rolled over a firepit. Twice. I am the action roll king
He dared me to drink a bottle of olive oil in exchange for a 30 pack... So much for loosing the freshman fifteen this year.
I will seriously deflate and melt into the floor into a puddle of devestation, shame and vodka.
CHEMICAL ENGINEER. God my mom would be so proud of me.
Nah nah nah the rules are different on st patty day, drink beer or die. It's like the hunger games but blurrier
We were simultaneously boning chicks 3 feet away from each other. Do you realize how much that upped our 15 year friendship?
holy shit the woman im hooking up with is closer to my moms age than my own
no we just smoked too much weed and listened to the tarzan soundtrack. phil collins is amazing
If my drunken penis pic is ever to be forgiven id like to start over with all that
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