there should be a relationship option on facebook "stillllll in a relationship"
The bouncer asked you what your sign was and u replied "syracuse"
does anyone know how to get red sharpie out of a white cat?
All I need in life is some dick and a big mac.
I wonder what it's like for my roommate to live bicuriously thro my sex life
Phone sex soon? I mean date. Sex date. Date phone.
all 3? possibly?
I think I'm up to the challenge.
When Pony by ginuwine plays I pretty much just grind on the nearest penis.
You want to groom your chest hair? You mean with a little baby chest hair brush? Because that sounds adorable.
sex, shower, sex, ice cream sandwiches?
Also I'm proud of us for having an educational conversation in this group text.
I just almost caught my floor on fire, then decided I could put it out with my knuckles! So I'm doing good!
I'm not gonna lie. I'm a little scared.
Good. The Jell-O shots look great.
I gave him a blowjob to kill bill. 2 of my favorite things.
So how was it?
The cemetery or the sex?
I feel like I got hit by a car. But a small car, like a Beetle or a Mini or something.
Randomize
