yah I made NO friends last night. at one point i think i replaced talking with spitting
I'm going to but the new Playboy with Chelsea Handler on the cover. I'm pretty sure it's the only time buying a Playboy will make me gayer...
season finale of lost and an oz of weed. tonight my mind is going to be blown.
I'm celebrating tres de junio so if you can help me find some sombreros ill be grateful. Also, today in 1992 Aborigines were granted rights to their land so I might need some boomerangs.
I don't think I have ever puked up that much free breakfast in my life...thank god for Nickle Beers.
Please tell me why your entire hallway smells like microwaved condoms.
20 bottles of wine, 3 cases or beer, and 5 bottles in my kitchen... My parents are teasing me.
Uh yeah. I ate a brick of cheese. Didn't even cut it. We were admiring the teeth marks I was leaving. We decided it was the negative of my mouth
I misunderstood what a furry was. Come pick me up.
To sum up. The glass blower from the ren faire ate me out last night. Best ever. Go find yourself an artisan.
What's the right thing to say when he sends me a picture of his penis ?
Xanax and an ambien. And wine. I'm just waiting for mouth to mouth from some hot EMT. Sort of like the slutty girls version of sleeping beauty
Miscalculate d the jungle juice, it's actually 10%. Can't taste the diff anyway but my stomcha is warm. Come play pongm.
On the way home there was a guy passed out IN the road on Colfax with his pants around his ankles, completely bare assed. If he was dressed as a speed bump, he succeeded.
I told him he looked like my uncle.
Why would you say that in a bathtub?
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