you alive?
ya, the episode of maury where people are afraid of things are on, i had to keep livin
You dont understand. she was my french AND spanish teacher. that's 2 kinds of freaky. i have to find her on facebook.
We're not too concerned with getting her out of jail. We're on a mission for donuts.
What did I eat last night that was bloody?
Sorry about blasting sandstorm on a loop when i left for work this morning. But maybe this will teach you to not come home trashed on a tuesday night with some chick and have loud sex till 4 in the morning. The walls are thin, remember?
Hundreds of bug bites..Dad jokingly says "looks like you passed out naked in the woods somewhere"
I tried to convince the Lobo Card people to take my pic with my sunglasses on because I will probably always be this hungover.
That's good. Don't want to see you bellydancing in prison for homemade wine.
It's 4 am here and I just vomited myself awake....Not rising OR shining any time soon
For some reason she gave me a handjob. It was all very confusing
If you find me in the bathroom in a fetal position, licking frozen bacon .. I might have Drank a little too much.
I just took a condom out of my purse and opened it in front of my entire family because I thought it was a wetnap. Way too hungover for family brunch.
what color bed sheets say meditative warrior but also welcome to my sex dungeon...
navy blue
The fact that you have an answer to that is why we are friends...
Two questions: is there going to be a bathroom at this party, and can we fuck in it. This will define whether or not I enjoy going to parties with you.
I'm just really glad SD weather is so erratic so I can get away with wearing a scarf in May to cover up these hickeys.
Randomize
