i hope kanye doesn't show up to patrick swayze's funeral. " i'll let you get back to your funeral in a minute...but michael jackson had the best death of the year. just sayinnn ".
so far i wrote 500 words for a paper on sean paul performing we be burnin..i can officially do anything on adderral
I don't hate you. My dick is upset with you, but I don't hate you.
Don't play hard to get, I've seen some of the girls you've slept with.
just stole 2 cases of forties from some freshman in the woods by pretending to be a cop. that ten dollar spotlight is really turning a profit
for once, the $56 i am about to pay for plan b was actually worth the sex.
This is a pre-sorry for hitting on and then sleeping with you're ex
You can do it. What doesn't kill us just drives us to drink
Look. If you get me out of this speeding ticket you can bang my sister. Or my mom. But not both.
Just had the "whores are people too" talk with Mom. Bright side it's Christmas, and I may have been drunk, I don't think she caught on.
I took your mattress from your bed. Don't ask questions. Love you. See ya later.
I FUCKED THE WRONG FRIEND HELP ME
Got drunk in Atlantic City Flagged down some guy with two wrapped tampons like road flares for a cigarette.
My legacy here is being that tiny blonde girl that threw someone down and shouted "Fuck your face, I'm Dee Dee Ramone."
Hiding in a kitchen with no pants orange juice abs a pillow...please joun
I haye tequella
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