Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
This was just another one of those days you wished you had a penis-size indicator instead of wasting your time isn't it?
Woke up today to the sound of church bells. My first thought was shit the apocalypse, but then I remembered my hook up lives next to a church. This might be a rough day.
July fourth my place, drunken bubble slip n slide. Yes this is happening and yes I am 31
I woke up to her screaming at the various pictures of nutsacks she found on her camera
I know it must have been a hard break up. Are you okay?
Oh yeah, I'm fine dude. My vaginas heart is broken though. I feel bad for her, you should give her a call sometime.
I think I accidentally invented a religion.
Rumor has it that you want to bring me soup in exchange for a blow job.
I just want to slap everyone in the face that's happy being sober. Loser.
Hmmm, well all I'm saying is don't do anything too irrational because you miss him and are blinded by his large penis.
i woke up between my boyfriend and his sister and i don't know if we fucked or cried together
I fuckin love you!
I would reciprocate the feeling if i knew who this was.
I'm tired of you and your emotional constipation. WHY DO YOU CLOSE YOUR EYES WHEN WE MAKE LOVE!?
I put the child locks on after I put you in the car and you then screamed, "I am a Phoenix, you can't restrain me. I NEED TO FLY!"
Holy shit he’s stupid hot! If you don’t hurry up and make a move my ovaries are going to march over there and introduce themselves
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