Okay just took the preggers test..and im NOT! :)
awesome babe! drinks tonight!
Wait does the happy face mean yes? fuck.
trent lit his nipple on fire and said "i am the only highlander"
it's a shame restraining orders have to come between me and my relationships
i fucked her mom dude
there's something to tell the kids
We drank a $4 handle of tequila until 5 am. Please think about that.
the girl in my class has a rolling backpack and just told it to stay. im too hungover for this.
Dude.. full face helmets and hangovers do not mix... I am never going to get rid of the smell of puke.
Why is hotel staff askin about the blood in our room
No. Mother. Fucking. Jello shots. Just no. I'm not falling into that trap again.
trust me. coming from a bonafide dirtbag, this dude is up to shady shit
Looking back on this weekend, I'm most grateful I never brought up with word "toe-fucking" at the bachelorette party.
I don't know. I'm drunk and dressed as a pirate but ill do the math tomorrow morning.
The lowest point of my life has been reached. I just drank half a jar of pasta sauce.
i had every intention of working out now im just drinking wine and thinking about taking nudes in my thigh high tube socks
I'm glad we smoked together,that was probs the biggest sibling bonding we will ever have.
Randomize
