We just made watching Intervention into a drinking game. We drink everytime someone does drungs.
If there was a creeper hall of fame you and me would be the first two inductees
First day at work... I clogged up the office toilet on purpose to assert my dominance.
Once you realized you couldn't finish the 30 you started walking down the street and leaving a beer in everyone's mailbox
im looking at burger kings website. there isnt one anywhere close to where we were last night. i think it was sent from heaven
The bartender just told me he would have me face down in his pillow by the end of the night. I hate when you make me go to gay clubs.
You three are like the Bermuda Triangle for morals.
I have been way too involved with your nipples this weekend
let's just pour the lemonade mix into the soco. cut out the middle man.
getting up at 8am to start drinking seemed like a much better idea before I had to wake up at 8am
I've made friends with the guy dressed as a gorilla that was chasing the guy dressed as a banana around with a super soaker full of vodka. I feel this will be a good relationship for me.
Yeah, I wish I could have one upped you. But all I did was ride circles around a cop on a stolen bicycle while laughing at him for telling me to stop riding on the sidewalk.
He called himself Jesus all night but I'm not sure if that's his real name or not
I thought my broken hand would put a damper on Halloween, but fake costume eyelashes and hydrocodone are kinda fun at the same time.
Not really how I planned to achieve immortality, but I'll take it.
Randomize
