I just woke up in bed with 4 girls. Either i dont remember the best night of my life or they think im gay.
He has jerked off in so many socks I am surprised he doesn't have athletes dick
You left a skid on my bar stool!!!!
Oops! Sorry about getting stool on your stool!
He yelled IN THE FACE!! while cumming on my face.
New policy: when a woman uses the word blowjob in a sentence within 5 minutes of meeting her, you buy her a drink.
Ahhh November 1st. National Untagging Day
you made them have somersault races with you thru the lobby..
After he came, I wiped my mouth on my baby blanket. I could feel nana rolling over in her grave.
A dude was barking out of one of the buildings so I barked back and he goes, "Oh shit! She barked back! Come to room 803 I'll fuck you!"
If I were better looking, this would be the point where I'd resign myself to stripping.
I've had more sex since the twins moved in than I'd had in the previous four years. They are the best wingman ever.
I'm hosting my annual valentine's day party tomorrow with every hookup I've ever had. thoughts on how it will turn out ??
HOLY FUCK i just remembered we had bows and arrows and firecrackers last night
and flaming arrows and vodka
how did we not set your garage on fire
Noo not in a booty call way, in a 'How are your abs and penis doing today?' sort of way.
after the ketamine those signs on the bathroom door had little meaning to us
Randomize
