i fuckib htae you, you church bitch.
He told me he had never done that before...I responded with "clearly"
I just farted for five sidewalk sections! New personal best.
I don't know. I guess at the end of the day I wanted taco bell more than a boyfriend.
Totally get that.
I woke up to ritz crackers on the lawn, a keystone behind the hedge and puke on the rental car... i think that we have become that house...
thanks. im glad you find me better in your comparison between me and fat girl porn.
Article 1, law 1, section 1 of the apartment 25 party handbook: tarp will be purchased prior to any and all future parties. Aforementioned tarp will be placed on floor. Any and all sick patrons must relocate to tarp preceding the event of expulsion of bodily fluids. Failure to do so will result in ejection of guilty patron and banishment of the accused from succeeding party. All patrons must read and sign a copy before entry is granted.
The light burnt out and he thinks the power is out in the whole house. He is cooking a hog dog over two candles. I'm gonna see if he'll make me one
You pulled out a fucking recorder and started playing along with all the songs on your playlist and refused to hit the j
Today I'm playing this game called how physically long can I Lay in this one spot before moving, do you have an estimated time of departure?
I thought if I bought the most expensive pregnancy test I would look like I had my life together
You went to pound town last night and chow town this morning. Boy you need a passport.
he made that chewbacca noise when he came. like father like son i guess.
Remind me to never do anything where hiding something in my butt is the best course of action
That married penis I’ve been riding offered to pay off my student loans. I was going to break it off because he has lousy stamina. Is being debt free worth putting up with mediocre sex?
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