So you know how craigslist used to have an "erotica" section? And how after you click on a link it changes a darker color? And how Dad stays up really late most nights?
Oh god... well at least he's gettin some. Mom's a prude.
I started the year with 2,800 dollars and am now down to 83 dollars-one of which i use to snort my focalin. I have given up on food and am perplexed as to how I can make 82 dollars last more than two weekends for booze
They ran through the sprinklers in front of campus police, shirtless. Singing "love is a battlefield"
I put the condom across her upper lip. It was like a mustache of a job well done.
I'm a busy girl. All I wanted was noncommittal sex a few times a week
Hungover and I may throw up in my therapist's office. Maybe he is right about my drinking
Having to explain to my dad why there are chicken wings to the pool filter, new low.
You went down on Rachel in front me last night. Worst. Brother. Ever.
Cory and I accidentally had a sexual adventure last night.
How do you ACCIDENTALLY have a sexual adventure?
We were on the ground in Tampa for 55 hours and we drank for 30 of them.
We won Spring Training 2013.
The only thing I remember from last night is being naked in his bed if that's not summer drinking at it's finest then I don't wanna live anymore
My car insurance payment showed up today, so no inflatable hot tub for now. Sorry to disappoint.
feeding cats lunchmeat on my kitchen floor. come pour me another shot.
My boss and I ended up at the same strip club. We both got lap dances while talking about work.
I was peer pressured into smoking weed by a bunch of LGBTQ teenagers
Randomize
