Definitely saw about 20 people at my final that were never present before. It's like seeing who's gonna be serving me fries in 4 years.
got hammered last night, woke up this morning to 38 texts that varied from "you fucking asshole" to "i can be there in 10 minutes"
You were in the garage half naked counting your ribs and talking about how you had too many
I drank mimosas and played bocce ball in the middle of finals week...now i know how Comm majors feel all the time.
Dude I think I was making out with the cat last night
I don't have a cat..?
Well nonetheless. Whatever it was purred when I used tounge.
she wanted to watch hairspray while we fucked. she's obviously your kinda girl, dude.
In your drunken brilliance did you make bagel with what appears to be mac and cheese smeared on top and pink icing dip? Because if so it is sitting on the counter
5 am booty call.. And I went I need to gain better control of my vagina
i ran into my coworkers when i was walking home last night. i was shirtless. i think i gave my shirt to Walter. he's a cat.
im still drunk. birthday week begins.
I'm gonna take off my shirt and spin it around my head like petey Pablo so u can find us
and it seems i've caught your masturbating bug. thanks.
Ski vacations are for hooking up with randoms. It's like I don't even know you
I just wanna be able to fart and do my homework but he won't leave
You went to pound town last night and chow town this morning. Boy you need a passport.
When I go to hand him the blunt and he's eating a cookie and responds with "let me hit this cookie"
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